Social Media: How to Create a Safe and Loving Space
Social media is a platform so many of us have a love hate relationship with. It has the capacity to connect us with those around the world, and at the same time disconnect us from the real world and what’s in front of us. It allows us to share our stories, our brands, our businesses and at the same time can cause crippling levels of self-judgement, self-comparison, and even trigger anxiety and depression in some people.
A recent study showed students who spent time looking at their friends Facebook profiles felt worse about themselves and had increased negative thoughts vs those who spent time looking at their own Facebook profiles who felt empowered and had positive thoughts about themselves. I fell upon this study during my time studying Psychology and it sparked a shift in how I choose to consume social media and how I use it to support me, instead of polarize me.
Here are some tips for how I ensure social media remains a safe space for me and one of joy:
Be a creator, not a consumer. Focus on what you are sharing with your followers and the world. Ask yourself why are you posting this particular feed or story? Does it come from a place of love, or ego? How does this post contribute to those around me? I share the things I need to hear through my writing and my content. I share for me first and foremost. It’s about me and not anyone else – but if someone resonates with what I share and gets something out of it, then even better.
Limit screen time. Set yourself time limits on social media, and review your weekly screen time average. It can be both scary and shocking when you do this in the beginning. Shocking because sometimes you do not realize how much you scroll. I know I spend far too much time on social media and know I can reduce my screen time spend even more. Batching is a great way of doing this if you are a brand or business.
Unfollow people who make you feel bad. Yes, you have the power to choose who you follow. If someone you follow makes you feel fat, unworthy, unsuccessful, not good enough because of self-comparison. Unfollow that shit. You do not have to follow them and by doing so you’re creating boundaries and telling yourself you respect yourself. Once you have healed the part of you which gets triggered by what they share then you can look at potentially following them again in the future. If you’re being triggered by what someone posts usually it’s a sign you need to heal something within yourself. Do the work and lean in to the feelings you are feeling.
Support your friends. Share your friends work, comment on their photos, like their posts. Be the biggest cheerleader you can be when it comes to what your friends share. Connection and creation is what social media is about and I’ve made some incredible friends through social media. Show people you care about their message by getting involved and getting excited.
Social media can be an incredible tool if we learn how to use it wisely. Remember you have the power when it comes to social media. You can choose what you post, what you consume and how you interact with it. If you still feel like it’s not serving you, maybe take a break. I’ve taken many a social media hiatus to disconnect from what others are doing to solely focus on me and my own healing. Listen to your inner voice and what it’s telling you do. You will know what’s best for you.
Happy creating team!
- R